Arianna Georgi

While I was looking at things to do this weekend, I came upon the following:

The Tequila Festival and Expo is returning to Tijuana, BC MX on October 12 through 19 at the Revolution Avenue. The festival is an exciting and culturally intense event because its main focus is on educating visitors on, and tasting the many different types of tequila in Mexico.

Five Star Tours is providing one of a kind tours to the annual Tequila Expo in Tijuana, MX. The Tequila Expo is an event where participants will have the opportunity to taste and savor over 100 different tequilas from different parts of Mexico. You will also learn how to distinguish by taste, smell and color what makes very good tequila. You can also buy and import all tequilas on sight for your pleasure at your home or wherever it may lead. The Tequila Expo Tour will be one of the best tours you’ll ever take this side of the border.

Upon boarding a tequila expert will teach you the history of tequila and how to be able to distinguish certain tequilas by different factors. We also have an opportunity to taste tequila on board the bus! The tequila expert will give the best tips on how to find Tequila bargains.

We will cross the border and proceed to the Expo. There you will go leisurely to taste, sample, learn & buy the tequilas of your choice. Remember it is UNLIMITED Tequila Tasting at its Finest!

Also, you will have free time to do shopping & have lunch at your own leisure (lunch is not included)

Now, I am not one of those people that turns pale and dry-heaves when peoeple mention tequila, but I will admitt that most nights that involve tequila shots for me don’t really end in going to be with a glass of warm milk (especially if the nigh also does not include food).  I can only imagine what an entire Tequila Expo would do.  There’s an attempt there to class up the idea of pounding tequila by calling the whole thing a tequila “education” and bringing a tequila “expert,” but really isn’t this just going to end the same way?  (Also, how do you become a tequila expert?  Years and years of tequila school?)   The statement that, “You can also buy and import all tequilas on sight for your pleasure at your home or wherever it may lead” really doesn’t make me feel any less uneasy about this whole thing… since the only place tequila has lead me to before was passing out in a park and playing fake guitar at a kareoke bar (see below). 

Anyway, I just wanted to make a short note of it before I headed off to work.  Is anyone planning on going?  Does anyone else think that this is pretty much the worst idea ever?

Tags: Bad Ideas, Tequila

(This is how I look when I camp)

Last weekend I went to Leo Carrillo National Park to camp and generally enjoy the great outdoors for the few days (which for me mainly means drink lots of beers and eat grilled cheese sandwiches). I had been looking forward to the trip since I booked it back in May since Leo Carrillo is basically the 5 star hotel of camping spots and is incredibly hard to get a reservation at from May to about December. It’s on the beach, has wonderful shady camping spots and is one of the more gorgeous places I’ve ever been. Anyway, in preparation for the trip, I did some research online and came across this eHow article on vacationing there. The article detailed how to make a reservation to go there (useful), instructions that in order to camp you need to set up your tent (campers should probably already know this, but ok), and what to do in the morning (”Wake up to the smell of burnt out campfires, the sun just coming up and birds chirping,” it would sort of suck if you didn’t wake up).

Anyway, I had not really had any experience with eHow before I was facinated to look through it. eHow is an interesting idea but it results in some very ridiculous instructions for things you should already know how to do (typing in “how to tie your shoes,” for instance, gives you 4,150 results). I decided that today, I will attempt to live an entire day simply by following eHow instructions.

7:00- Wake up and drink coffee

Articles that could help me with this include:

How to Wake Up in Good Mood and How to Brew Coffee (which hasthe very exact instruction “Serve in a large mug with 18% cream and sugar to taste”  18%???  how do I measure this?).

8:30- Drive to Work

Can I shorten my commute anymore if it’s already 4 miles?

9:00- Work

How to Meditate at Work 

5:30- Spin Class

For a while now, I’ve been trying to figure out How to Enjoy strenuous exercise.   If only I had read this and known that my problem was not wearing appropriate clothing!

7:30- Dinner

How to Finish Dinner on Time 

In short, eHow could instruct me on how to live my entire day.  I mean, I could spend the time trying to figure out how to brew coffee or wake up on my own, but why bother when I can ask the average internet user and get an answer?

The information age rocks.

Tags: , camping, eHow

Sometimes, in the morning, I get a cup of coffee and troll craigslist looking at their “Free stuff” section to see if there is anything good.  Mostly it’s just pictures of free couches with suspicious looking stains or someone giving away a bizarre assortment of things they found in the back of their yard and/or freezer (a recent posting was for free soy ice cream bars and the poster swore that they had only eaten one), but occasionally there is something really awesome on their (not that I ever go get the awesome things… I am too lazy, even for free stuff).  Anyway, this morning, there was this mysterious post for, for free bees:

–Free Bees, you remove.

The post also had a phone number, but there was really no other supplementary information.  This, of course is exactly the kind of thing that gets me thinking.  What circumstances lead you to have a bunch of free bees?  What do people charge for bees that aren’t free?  With the nationwide shortage of bees should we even really be giving bees away?  How do you remove a bunch of free bees? 

I am sort of tempted to call this person and try and get the free bees for myself.  Having an army of bees to do my bidding would be pretty awesome (although I imagine bees are sort of hard to control and more interested in making honey than waging war).  Anyway, thought I would toss it up here so everyone else could ponder it too…

Tags: bees, craigslist, free

There is something that occurs in Maxim Magazine interviews that I like to call “Hot Girl Trying to be Even Hotter By Making Stuff Up Syndrome” (or HGTEHBMSUS for short).  Basically it occurs when a girl who is already ridiculously hot and famous in an incredibly obscure way (Brazil’s Number 1 Thong Model!) then gives an interview to Maxim magazine so that the men that purchase it have something to point to when they are trying to convince their girlfriends that they aren’t just looking at Thong Models.  In this interview, the Hot Girl in question will make a variety of incredibly unbelievable statements that she obviously thinks will make most men find her even hotter.  “There’s nothing I love more than giving my boyfriend a massage while he watches his favorite sports team and eats chicken wings,” the model will say (Maxim will then put this quote in bold on top of a photo of said model licking a popsicle).   “I also really like wearing lingerie around the house while I clean, drink beers, and fantasize about that hot drunken night my college roommate and I had in Cabo” she’ll add.  HGTEHBMSUS is basically the magazine equivalent of kissing your sobriety sister at a Frat party to get guys.  Completely false, manipulative, and embarrassing for everyone involved and anyone that actually falls for it.  So far, I had only seen it in Maxim magazine, but today HGTEHBMSUS hit a whole new level, it spread to GQ.

Megan Fox, last seen pretending to be the world’s most unrealistic 16 year old (even Michael Bay should be ashamed) in Transformers opened up to GQ about a lesbian affair she had when she was 18.  It is safe to bet this was a hard decision for Megan Fox, but one she felt she had to make because it was a question being brutally honest with her adoring fan base (also one that had NOTHING to do whatsoever with the upcoming Transformers 2 and Fox’s movie “How to Lose Friends and Alienate People” which opens October 3^rd).   From CNN:

Megan Fox has nothing to hide.

The candid 22-year-old “Transformers” star, who’s currently engaged to actor Brian Austin Green, opened up to GQ about her love life, telling the magazine she was once in love with a female stripper. Fox, who appears on the October cover in a black bikini, said she was in the relationship when she was 18 and first living in Los Angeles alone.

“Well, that year my boyfriend broke up with me, and I decided - oh man, sorry, mommy! - that I was in love with this girl that worked at the Body Shop,” said Fox. “I decided that I was going to get her to love me back, and I went out of my way to create a relationship with this girl, a stripper named Nikita.”

Fox said Nikita would do “these beautiful slow dances to Aerosmith ballads.” The actress also said she would bring the Russian stripper gifts and try to inspire her to quit her line of work.

Fox’s publicist, Dominique Appel, confirmed the contents of the GQ report Monday.

Despite the brief relationship with a woman, Fox said she does not identify herself as gay.

“Look, I’m not a lesbian,” said Fox. “I just think that all humans are born with the ability to be attracted to both sexes. I mean, I could see myself in a relationship with a girl - Olivia Wilde is so sexy she makes me want to strangle a mountain ox with my bare hands. She’s mesmerizing. And lately I’ve been obsessed with Jenna Jameson, but … oh boy.”

Wow, Megan Fox, really?  You just so happened to have had a hot lesbian affair that happens to sound exactly it was ripped from the dreams of the average 14 year old boy (your target audience)?  If Megan Fox was going to make up some bisexuality to make herself more interesting you would think she would AT LEAST be a little bit more subtle about it rather than going all out and throwing in a strip club, a Russian stripper named Nikita (Hannah, is that even really a Russian name???), AND Aerosmith ballads.  I mean, come on Megan Fox, did you guys also sometimes ride sweet fourwheelers together while you were wearing bikinis and drinking Steel Reserve?  Did you have a day job where you were a librarian, but you know, a really sexy one? 

Megan Fox then goes on to even further destroy any credibility by listing as her two celebrity crushes  Olivia Wilde (who plays a bisexual on House and has also frequented Maxim’s “Hot Lists”) and Jenna Jameson (she wasn’t even trying with that one). I like how Megan Fox, (much like the Katie Perty song “I Kissed a Girl”) is quick to point out that she isn’t actually gay (average 14 year old boy you still have a chance!) she just likes women when in the most titillating possible scenarios.  In fact, maybe Megan Fox and Katie Perry can get together and discuss how they like kissing super hot girls (Katie Perry claims her inspiration was Scarlett Johansson), but they hope their boyfriends are cool with it because they totally have boyfriends are not actually real lesbians. 

Someone needs to call Nikita for a comment.

Tags: completely BS publicity stunts, HGTEHBMSUS, Maxim Magazine, Megan Fix, Scarlett Johansson

 I recently saw Tropic Thunder in the theatre and before it, I had the pleasure of seeing a trailer for a movie called Proud American.  The trailer was very confusing to me, as Tropic Thunder already had a series of fake and ridiculously over the top previews before it and it was very hard to tell if this ridiculously over the top preview was real or not.  When it started I began looking around at people next to me with a shocked, “is this really happening?” type gaze.  Anyway, it is real.  Very, very real.

Ladies and gentlemen, MasterCard, Coca-Cola, Wal-Mart present Proud American, a film by Fred Ashman who, according to the IMDB has pretty much only made… Proud American:

When this preview started, I initially thought it was a join the Marines commercial.  “Ah, they god rid of that guy climbing a mountain and fighting a digital dragon,” I thought.  “That’s nice.”  I quickly realized however that this was a trailer (although fake or real I still couldn’t tell) mainly because some with a deep voice starting saying things like “A kid from one of the toughest neighborhoods in the world, faces tought choices.”   On one hand the deep voiced narration and glossy overall feel made it seem like someone spent a fair amount of money on the whole thing, on the other, it seemed so over the top…with shots of the grand canyon intermixed with footage of pretty much every war memorial that exist, as well as a bunch of sailors.  Then the dialogue started and confused me even more. 

By far, the best part of this trailer is when Ruthie from 7th Heaven tells the poor immigrant girl she can’t sit at their table in the lunch room and then says “don’t you have a boat to catch” one of the worst and greatest “burns” I have ever heard.  The girl looks like she’s about 30, and I feel sort of sad for Ruthie.  I mean, is this really the only work she could get after 7th Heaven?  At least Jessica Biel is dating Justin Timberlake, which I would consider a fulltime job.

I also like the part where the paralyzed Navy Seal is inspired to participate in a marathon by some guy who comes in his hospital room, waves a medal in his face, and says “this is to remind you of who you are!”  I wonder how often this happens in actual hospital situations.  Like when I was a freshman JV basketball player (the only time in my life I was ever a basketball player) I won “Most Improved Player.”  Where I to ever be in a hospital, wanting to give up, I wonder if my mom would run in waving the certificate in the air and yelling that I should remember who I am. 

According to Walmart and Coca-Cola, this is what America is all about.  People in the most clichéd possible situations… I mean uh, “some of the most touching human moments ever presented on the giant screen” (according to the official site). 

 I plan on buying a Proud American coffee mug to show my support.

Tags: , Movies, Proud American