Sep 15 2008
The New Urban Outfitters Catalogue is a Horror Movie Waiting to Happen
I’ll be the first to admit, I don’t really understand Urban Outfitters. The faded tee-shirts that look like they came from the bottom of a box in the back of Salvation Army and retail for 34 dollars, the “ironic” stupid hipster books they sell, the fact that I can’t really tell how most of the clothing there is supposed to be worn (is it a scarf, a sweater or a purse?). Urban Outfitters has always eluded me, so maybe that’s why I don’t really understand what the hell is going on in the Fall catalogue. What is clear to me, is that someone, at some point, decided the best way to sell clothes was to put them on drugged and/or emaciated looking models and then have those model all pose as though they are just about to be murdered by a serial killer, turned into a zombie, and/or are a ghost. Makes sense, right? Basically, every single model in the new catalogue looks like she’s participating in some sort of horror movie.
Watch out, Girl Modeling the 20 dollar Huntington Scarf!!!!!! Clearly you’ve just heard something alarming behind you causing you to turn your glassy eyes to look over your shoulder. Was it an ax-murder sneaking up on you in the woods? Maybe it was just someone just trying to chase you down so they can let you know jumpers are a really, really bad idea.
Oh no, Girl in 68 Dollar sweater vest! You never should have left the camping trip/séance you were hanging out at with the Huntington Scarf Girl to go by yourself into the woods. Something terrifying has obviously occurred on the left side of this photo and I really doubt you are going to be able to run far in those shoes.
This girl is clearly a ghost doomed to wander the woods endlessly looking for the pants that went with her overly expensive ponhco. Seriously, if I was out alone somewhere and this girl walked by with her Samara Morgan hair and her limp, emaciated limbs I would head the other direction.
I feel bad for this girl. Unfortunantly, started her so much that she ran into the woods and completely forgot her dress is totally see through. Not only that, but her dress doesn’t even look particuarly warm. When the ghost girl shows up, I am pretty sure this girl is doomed.
This girl is obviously a zombie.
Urban Outfitters has clearly cornered the fashionable zombie, ghost, and horror movie vicitim market.
One response so far
Advertising with weak helpless women in inappropriate environments. Surprise!
There is no refuting your zombie observations, but you have opened some complex topics that need exploration. For me the question is not whether this is good fashion. We all have different tastes and means for expressing ourselves and I for one am thankful that those interests and methods are so wide and varied. The question first becomes whether or not buying a brand image is an actual form of expression.
Recently I debated this question with a friend of mine whose broader circle of friends could be considered a certain genus of urban hipsters. They shop predominately at thrift stores, with the occasional visit to a major clothier, otherwise making and sewing the remainder of their wardrobe. I’m not sure how the conversation began but my friend posited that there was an intrinsic value and honesty in the fashion among his friends over those who would shop at a place such as Urban Outfitters or Abercrombie & Fitch (the actual reference in the conversation). I argued that there was no difference between those who seek out an identifying style from a major brand retailer and manufacturing a style from used and homemade clothing and accessories.
Not everyone is as creative or has the time to create original fashion to help express their own individual brand identity. I do believe however, we are all representing ourselves by what we choose to wear, even if that is a choice by default by sticking with banal and mainstream fashions. By this logic designers and outlets such as the Urban Outfitters are clearly providing a service to society, allowing those who are not creative-centric to express themselves creatively beyond the banal and mainstream through their fashion, even if the true value and message conveyed through that fashion is purely contrived through marketing and overly artificial social constructs attached to the marketing and brand.
In the documentary, The Human Animal: Beyond Survival by Desmond Morris (http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=288620113099989944&hl=en) this phenomena is specifically discussed. Desmond Morris, a zoologist cum anthropologist, shifted his interest and attention from the animal kingdom at large to humans as animals. In Beyond Survival, Morris explores what it means to be human through the activities, behaviors, and rituals the human animal engages that have nothing to do with survival. Among such activities is certainly fashion. Morris discusses the amazing lengths humans go to decorate themselves. After citing examples of primitive and modern tribes and cultures throughout history and the world he turns his attention specifically to make-up and fashion in the current era of civilization. At one point he discusses how the modern civilized world has removed much of the free time for the individual to directly participate in the ritual of creating their own clothes or body decorations. In place of this, companies have stepped in and filled the seemingly innate need to separate ourselves as individuals from the rest of the herd through fashion by providing a large array of ready-to-go fashions. In one example, Morris shares a man being watched via hidden camera selecting a tie. As Morris points out, the tie is a wholly superfluous accessory, and yet men, generally considered Neanderthal in their ability for fashion, labor over this pattern or cut of tie over another.
Personally, while I am not necessarily as opposed to the style of Urban Outfitters clothing or the brand it represents, I do actually value those who would create their own fashion over shopping at Urban Outfitters, even if that style were nearly identical to that brand. However, I do not discount an individual for choosing a particular designer or pre-fab brand and style simply for not having the wherewithal to create those fashions for themselves. The real issue for me, and may be the underlying context for your post is what those brands and styles are representing, whether I think that the marketing and brand behind the fashion are in any way positive for society as a whole.
One one hand, part of me holds a zen (a western “go with the flow / acceptance” sort of zen) or egalitarian view, finding commentary and ridicule such as yours needlessly divisive and judgmental and extremely negative humor that brings society down as much as the possibly very real thing it is detracting.
On another hand, I use such things as shopping at Urban Outfitters and Abercrombie & Fitch as easy flags for whether or not I even want to talk to someone, being at heart a judgmental egomaniac who believes that such things as the Urban Outfitters are perfect examples of why we need a new revolution and to perfect space travel to get off this rock and away from the idiots who are clearly destroying the beautiful thing that is humanity and life itself through corporate capitalization of individual liberties and creativity.
All of this of course only applies if we are talking about humans.
With my third eye, I see the the truth. I understand the threat the zombies represent. I am constantly scheming and plotting where I will relocate and what supplies and weaponry I will require when the zombie apocalypse occurs. I see through the zombie agenda and their clear attempts through fronts such as the Urban Outfitters to acclimate us to the slow zombie invasion currently happening around the world right before our very eyes. The zombie lobby have upped the ante, going so far as to create television shows such as True Blood on HBO to further desensitize us to their zombie agenda and desire to “come out of the grave” as it were before they initiate their full scale coup. What’s worse, by using vampires (which everyone knows are fictional creatures) for their propaganda campaign, they are using classic slight of hand tricks to distract us from their real plans, first seeking rights within modern society, and then eating our brains. While the world might accept a vampire take over due to their cultural romance and intrigue, the zombies recognize that no one likes zombies, that they are anathema to all living creatures, and no one should like them, much less trust them, and they will stop at nothing to prepare us for their eventual take over attempt.
Therefore, despite my desire for a peaceful world where we all get along and accept each other, and it *should* be okay for Urban Outfitters to exist, the Urban Outfitters are clearly a Zombieist front, and they must be stopped. War is not always fought through violence, and clearly through the Urban Outfitters the zombies are bringing the battle into our closets and clubs.
It is our duty as proud members of the human race to immediately begin actively shunning any zombie sympathizer who is seen wearing or entering Urban Outfitters. Do not attempt violence on them however, as these fashion zombies are actually in the process of becoming zombies themselves, and you can not be sure of their strength as transmogrification is the last step in metamorphosis. Instead begin pointing and laughing and posting to your blog mocking these pathetic creatures. The only hope they have is that there is enough human left within them to begin to feel embarrassed and humiliated enough that what little human part of them remains can be shamed into returning to us.
The future of humanity is in our hands and we should all take a moment to thank Arianna for continually bringing these very real, very serious issues to the public consciousness.
Though, I do kind of like the sweater vest / dress outfit in picture number 2. I wonder if it comes in a size 16-18?